Reviewbrah is Life

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In this world, though you may not know it, someone beyond human is among us. Someone who has the greatest taste in fashion. The greatest taste in literature. The greatest taste in fast food.

His name is Reviewbrah, also known as the “ReportOfTheWeek.” You may have heard about him, you may have not. But this guy is a gem among all the rest of us garbage people.

What does he do you may be asking? He reviews fast food on YouTube. For seven whole years, Reviewbrah has been eating fast food and discussing his thoughts over lunch. He is rapidly growing, at already over  700,000 subscribers. When I first subscribed to his channel less than a month or so ago, he was a little over half a million subscribers.

He made his first video when he was about thirteen or fourteen years old, and has been reviewing food and drinks ever since. His first review ever was on Five Hour Energy, all the way back on February 20th, 2011. He has reviewed products like McDonald’s Chicken McNuggets, to the “infamous” King Series from Burger King. He reviews Starbucks, McDonalds, Arby’s, Steak’n’Shake and other places recommended by his viewers.

He reviews a product at least once a week, and every so often makes a lecture-like video, talking about hobbies, or his views on a brand. Every video, he is dressed formally, in a suit and tie, hair gelled back.

Many people theorize he is a vampire, because he is always dressed in a suit, and he’s so pale with these dead blue eyes. ElvisTheAlien said in his video in September, 2016: “Why is he always wearing a high-collared shirt, huh? Because he’s trying to cover his bite marks!” Reviewbrah does not mind these jokes and memes, and in a way seems to embrace them. What I mean by this is that he really didn’t change at all from his first video. He dresses the same, has a similar vocabulary from when he started, and still reviews food items in great detail.

There is something strangely addicting about “TheReportOfTheWeek.” When you first watch him, he may seem dull and uninteresting, droning on about fast food. But really, he becomes quite interesting. He has reviewed basically everything, and he seems to know his stuff. I enjoy how he describes the taste of the food and the texture in such great detail. that it makes me want to try the food for myself.

Another thing I really appreciate about our friend Reviewbrah is that he isn’t a slob. He doesn’t eat like a pig, spilling sauce, chomping on the “Angriest Whopper.” He takes small, graceful bites, making sure the food does not spill on his nice suit by putting the wrapper over his lap. He usually eats about half of the food, showing us a “cross-section,” before saying his opinion. At the end of the video, he says the rating of the food, out of ten, but he does go to the 0.1%. And after that, the video basically ends. He doesn’t lecture about some sponsor, or put in ad in the middle of his videos. It’s just a nice, simple ten minute review.

There are three different series on his channel that I watch mostly. “The Nameless Drink Series.” He opens it by going “This is….Review.” Another drink series is “Energy Crisis,” where he reviews energy drinks. And the most common series on TheReportOfTheWeek is “Running on empty, food review.” Every video, he greets his viewers with that saying.

In conclusion of this article, I think you should go and check out Reviewbrah’s channel as he reviews the Shamrock Shake. You won’t be disappointed, I promise you that (actually I don’t). But, you should watch his epic channel, ReportOfTheWeek. He’s literally a living meme, having his own page on “Know Your Meme.”

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